Please. You don’t have ‘HATERS’. You’re not important enough. People dislike you simply because you’re a loudmouthed asshole. So shut up.

HOORAY! Thanks to wonderful friends, I have finally joined the 21st Century and have a cellphone now. First order of business, take a 'Douchebag in the Mirror' pic. #DoingItRight

http://twitpic.com/5x9xir

I think I have an image problem and people think I’m a douche.
I’ve been called “Mr. Massengill” by three different people today. :/

I just tried to join a Tourette’s Facebook Group, but they told me to F**K off.

Why does everyone love me so much?
via Yahoo Answers
“Why I am awesome:
I feel as though:
If there was a God, I’d be his favorite.
If unicorns were real, they’d search for me as the mythical beast.
If Chuck Norris was at my house, he’d be making jokes about how awesome I am.
If a seeing person could see me, they’d go blind. And if I touched a blind man, he could see. But once he saw me, he’d be blind again.
If I was to get hit by a car, the car would merely split where it touched me.
If the sun was to consume earth, I would be the last survivor out in space.“

READ MORE (answers are hilarious) »

No idea who put that fake of me on Friendburst, but that dump would be the LAST place you’d find me.
http://www.friendburst.com/ericbrooks/

I just found out someone lost all respect for me because I just ain’t feeling it with Friendburst and think Kevin’s an ASSHOLE?

srs bzns folks

There is a reason I don’t hang out at Facebook all that much, you know…

Now That’s What I Call Emo : YouTube Edition (another emo video)
Hey emo kids, spin those grins into frowns with “Now That’s What I Call Emo : YouTube Edition!”

“2 wrongs don’t make a right” is today’s “cop out” by hypocrites who looked the other way when all the other wrongs were done

From TrendHunter.com – Viral Humor and Comedy -Ridiculous Self-Shots – GuysWithiPhones.com Captures Snaps of Macho Men (GALLERY):

“ (TrendHunter.com) It?s difficult to tell whether these guys love themselves or their iPhones more. But next in the line of single-serving websites is GuysWithiPhones.com. Yes, there is a GirlsWithiPhones.com, too!

Both?”